Book Review: The book that improved my marriage by 1000%

Something About Tendencies

In January 2017, JP, my husband, was struggling to communicate with me.

Three months prior, I was diagnosed with transitional depression in the midst of grieving the murder of my favorite uncle.

Our fun-filled evenings were replaced by constant arguments about me not doing the dishes and him trying to control me (at least that’s what my ego said).

Our marriage was suffering, and things had to change.

I knew it, 

… and He knew it too.


The 4 Tendencies

When JP read this book, he instantly became an evangelist.

Every other sentence, he would blur out:

“Gretchen says this…”

“Gretchen says that…”

Honestly, I didn’t care for it.

Six months later,

After I got tired of hearing him quote a woman who knew NOTHING about me,

I picked it up.

Here’s what I’ll cover in today’s short video:

  • Why JP(husband), started reading The 4 Tendencies,
  • What are the 4 tendencies,
  • How The 4 tendencies improved my marriage by 1000%,
  • How The 4 Tendencies can help you.

… and I was wrong.

Gretchen did know some things about me

It was like someone had recorded private footage of my life, down to the whole middle child thing, and sent it directly to Gretchen for review.

She not only watched it, and dissected it,

But she also wrote a whole book about it, and now I was holding it.

It was a personality profile book, but it didn’t feel like other similar books I’ve read before.

Gretchen did her homework, and it showed.

Since reading this book,

I’ve re-read it three times, including both with JP and the B-Word Chronicles (my book club).

It’s one of the books I recommend to everyone  I meet, and my students have all find it incredibly insightful.


Like any self-help book,

I cannot recommend The 4 Tendencies without a disclaimer,

If you read this book,

You will learn a lot of helpful information about yourself and the people around you.

Don’t stop there.

I’ve found that what truly changes the game,

What improved my marriage by 1000%,

Came down to everything we did with that information.

For example,

JP learned that he couldn’t make me do something I didn’t want to do.

So, he stopped trying.

He even stopped stressing over the dishes.

It turns out he didn’t like all that nagging either

It was exhausting.

The result:

Once he left me alone

I started doing the dishes, not because he wanted me to, but because I wanted to.

We like to think we’re these super-rational humans,


We’re not.

Not as much as we would like to think, anyway.

The more aware we become of this fact,

The more likely we will be of manifesting our dream life

Tools like The 4 Tendencies can help us make it happen.

Hasta Luego,


PS: Want to get notified when I release new videos? Subscribe to my YouTube channel here.

Unleash Your Best Self + Live A Life of Ease!

Master a life full of ease surrounded by ICONS committed to being the best version of themselves with joy, fun and enthusiasm.