How death inspires life with Death Doula Alua Arthur

You do the inner work, so you can do the outer work.

Alua Arthur

It was roughly 2 pm and I was laying on my living room couch, trying to take a nap. I was home early from work because I wasn’t feeling well. My body was feeling discomfort or pain.

The phone rang, I answered.

On the other end, there was a voice, crying, hurting, I could feel the pain from her tone:

She blurted out “They’ve killed him, they’ve killed our Califa”.

The voice belongs to my mother, and the call came almost three years go to date this week.

Califa was my favorite uncle, the only person who growing up, loved me unconditionally. I didn’t have to meet any expectation to enjoy his love, and his death introduced to me to new depths of suffering, suffering that later turned in to healing.

After this experience I wondered:

  • Why don’t we talk about death?
  • Why do we run away from it?
  • And how can we prepare for it in a more conscious and intentional way?


My guest today:

Alua Arthur has some answers, answers I know you will find helpful. 

A death doula, attorney and the founder of going with grace, end of life planning organization that exists to support people as they answer the question:

‘What must I do to be at peace with myself so that I may live presently and die peacefully?’ 

Together we had a raw conversation about how death brought us back to life. Somehow during this episode, there were tears, laughter, and healing. She opened up about being severely depressed, she shared how she defines being authentic and spoke about her work, the beauty, the challenge, and the surrender.

My hope for you is simple:

As you listen to this conversation, become a little less resistant towards death and allow it to inspire you to live.


Here’s what we’re going to cover in this episode:

  • Why people don’t talk about death.
  • How to get better at dealing with death.
  • How Alua knew she was severely depressed & what she did about it.
  • What happens when you do not pay attention to yourself and ignore feeling unfulfilled.
  • How to accept parts of you that you don’t like.
  • What is a death doula?
  • What’s the end of life planning?
  • What’s death meditation?
  • Why is silence so important and useful to healing.
  • The most challenging part of being a death doula.
  • When you should start making plans for the end of your life.


Recommended tools

Die Wise by Stephen Jenkinson


Connect with Alua





Get ready to awaken your self-awareness about death, starting right now!

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